Monday, August 20, 2012

Come Out, Come Out Wherever You Are


Recently, I had a hair disaster.   You know, the kind where you just squint your eyes, clench your teeth, square your shoulders and wait for it to grow before you can even think about fixing it.   Yes, it was uneven, but worse than that it was SHORT.    On the morning after, I got out of the shower, dried my hair, and looked in the mirror.  Horrified by what I saw, I realized (fighting back the tears) that it wasn’t just the bad haircut that was getting under my skin.   I felt exposed. 

It was at that moment that I realized that months of hectic traveling schedules, drive thru windows, and a newfound love of cupcake shops had caught up with me.  I was staring at a face that I tried to hide, behind the one thing that made me feel confident…hair.   Now, with the hair gone (and an uneven, bad style to boot), I could no longer hide, disguise, or justify my faults.   It was time for a long hard look in the mirror.  And I didn’t like what I saw.

You see, the reflection staring back at me reminded me of one word…failure.  Let me explain.  

In 2005 the Lord stopped my course and helped me make a U-turn that transformed me spiritually, physically, and emotionally.  He set me free from a lifetime of yo-yo dieting and riding emotional roller coasters related to the weight-loss saga.  He took me on a journey of health…and taught me that His yoke is easy and His burden is light when I learn the beauty of discipline that comes from following Him in mind, body, and soul.   That is another story for another time, but in short, I found myself 106 lbs lighter and completely free. It was not a short term crash diet.  With results that could still be seen 3, 4, and 5 years later, it was a lifetime transformation.  Or so I thought.

Then came that morning in the mirror.  The nagging thought that had been hounding me for months, as my exercise grew lighter and my clothes grew tighter,  was now reality. I could no longer deny the heart-wrenching failure I felt inside.  I had pushed aside the things I knew to be true in a quest for survival during a season of upheaval and change.   In trying to define a new normal for my family, I had lost myself.  I had strayed far from the formula I had found to follow Him in obedience.  I had hidden my fears and failures, covering them up with things that allowed me to justify them away.   My life had fallen out of balance, and my exposed face carried the proof.

Suddenly, as I came to grips with my hair drama and begin to face the truth, the Lord begin to whisper quietly to me.  I began to think about how, as a woman, I hide behind other things in my life. 

How many times have I hidden behind my children, my husband, my roles and responsibilities, my fears?   How often have I ignored the Holy Spirit’s leading to explore a new avenue of service because I am convinced it doesn’t fit my skill set or simply because it makes me uncomfortable?  How often have I lost myself in the name of taking care of my husband and children, convincing myself that my own needs were unimportant in this season of life?  How often have I not taken the time to reach out to someone because I’m afraid of rejection?  How often have I not tried something new because I was sure it would lead to failure?  How often do I, in my quest for perfection, refuse to tackle a task because I think its  impossible to meet my own unrealistic expectations?   How often have I not let my true self be exposed because I am afraid of judgment or disapproval from others?

It was time for some serious introspection.  Like the pieces of a puzzle coming together, I quickly realized that hiding can always be traced back to fear.  

Fear is crippling.  It paralyzes.  It places limits on us and causes us to plateau and give up when we should be climbing to higher heights.  It is one of the enemy’s greatest tools to defeat us and prevent us from birthing the dreams God has placed inside of us.

I thought about the disciples in John 6.  The Bible tells us they were sailing through rough waters and they were terrified.   Then Jesus showed up in a supernatural way, walking on the water, to calm their fears.  After He reassured them that He was there, He told them not to fear.  At that moment, they had a choice to make.  Verse 21 says “Then they were willing to take him into the boat”.  They had to be willing to invite him into their stormy, windy mess.  He didn’t force His way in.   The passage doesn’t say that the sea automatically grew still, even though we know He had the power to make it stop.  What it does say is this “and immediately the boat reached the shore where they were heading”.  When Jesus showed up and they were willing to invite Him in, He immediately helped them chart the course through their mess and they were able to reach their destination without delay. 

1 John 4 reassures us that God is love.   Love comes from Him.  He defines it.  He lives it.  He gives it.  And He calls us to love - Him, others, and ourselves - the way He loves.  Interestingly, verse 18 states “There is no fear in love.  But perfect love drives out fear”.  When we invite Jesus into our stormy mess to ride out the waves with us, His love washes away all fear.  In His love, we find freedom and there’s no longer a reason to hide.  When we take hold of His hand, we are quickly able to safely and securely reach our destination.


As I’ve sailed through this year, He’s been whispering to me about the depths of His grace.  He doesn’t call me to be perfect.  He just calls me to be the best me I can be....without fear.  And that requires no more hiding. I’m running after Him with heart exposed and arms wide open to embrace everything He has for me.  

Now if I can just decide what to do with this hair!   J

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